Semi-triumphant Return

Well, I've officially decided to raise this blog from the ashes of two years ago. I had a brief hiatus over at LJ, but that only lasted about a year. Maybe my attention span is simply too short.

I had initially intended to start a sort of "blog" on Flickr, but I just don't have the time to post an interesting picture most days. So my usual erratic, semi-regular posts here will have to suffice.

Well, since I haven't bothered to cross-post any entries of late to Blogger, I suppose I'll officially make the move completely.

The World at Large will now be featured (under same management) at its new location as It Puts the Satin in Your Panties. Same great taste, same low price.

Rocker Bodies and Dalí Dilemmas

EDIT: I just found that this post was never published (GS 081808)
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Well I haven’t posted in a couple days…

We went to Venice Beach and found some shark teeth…

Yesterday Mark and I went to the Salvador Dalí Museum. I thoroughly enjoyed it, but I found several things quite amusing:

First of all, the Dalí museum apparently draws homosexual men like butterflies to a flower.
Second of all, I find it quite humorous when two or more individuals find themselves viewing the same piece. Each person proceeds to sigh and coo to his or her companion of “Dalí’s amazing abilities as a photorealist” and the “fantasies depicted in the works of Miró”… next they will stare at the piece, their simple goal to be the final person “appreciating” such a work. In groups of three and four, the instant that one person gives up, the entire group relaxes with relief that he or she has been viewed as cultured and sophisticated and moves down the line.

Today mom, Mark, and I went to MOSI and saw the Bodies! Exhibition.

[On the way, we saw a corvette led by a truck with a rocking-chair in the back, both with their hazard lights on]Mom: “They must be going to the rocker-hospital… ‘Look out, look out, we’ve got a broken leg!’”
The cadavers on display were created through a process of using acetone immersion (for bodily water evacuation), a vacuum chamber (to remove acetone as vapor), and replacement of original fluids with a silicone polymer (down to the most basic intracellular level). As such, all bodies appeared as though they would were the person’s muscular or circulatory structure flayed while he was alive. Additionally, this dictates that the external genitalia be present in most cases.
Perhaps the most enjoyable part of the whole experience was observing people without their knowledge walk up to the models. Every single person would walk to the model, aim their face directly at the head, and move their eyes immediately down to the exposed penis. Every single person.

Of course, there were some rather large ones. ;)

We also watched a film in the MOSIMAX theater, which is basically watching a movie on the entire surface of a dome the size of a planetarium. I highly recommend it.

"Poodles Play Pinochle; Dog Show Cancelled"

Well what's the first thing you do on vacation? That's right, go to Wal-Mart...

• Wal-mart intercom: I need any member of management to the front for a 'Code Sunshine.' I don't know what a Code Sunshine is, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it's serious.

And some more pearls of wisdom from my mother...

• Mom: When I was a little boy my mother wouldn't even let us in the house until dinnertime.
  Mark: So those sex changes really do work, huh?
• Mom: Did you see those pants? Oh my god, cameltoe!

"Well then... what's orange? If this is red, I wanna know, What's orange?"

Well we finally made it to St. Pete... Thank God. Sixteen hours in a vehicle is not exactly my cup of jager.

On the way I did some homework, did some sleeping, and watched The Corpse Bride:

• Old Woman: [hitting skeleton with her walker] Bounder!
  Alfred the Skeleton: Sweetie pie!
  Old Woman: Cad! [hits him again]
  Alfred the Skeleton: Angel!
  Old Woman: Degenerate
  Alfred the Skeleton: GERTRUDE!
  Old Woman: [adjusts her glasses] Is that you, Alfred? But... you died fifteen years ago!
  Alfred the Skeleton: [grabs old woman and dips her] Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn!
  [kisses her]
  

... and Requiem for a Dream:

• Tyrone C. Love: California, here we come.
  Harry Goldfarb: It's Florida, Ty. Florida.
  Tyrone C. Love: California, Florida, whatever. Either way, your pale ass is getting a tan.
• Big Tim: I know it's pretty, baby, but I didn't bring it out for air.
  

And just so everyone's clear... I have no idea whose internet I'm mooching... just some random next-door neighbor with a wireless network, I assume... But I won't be using it for long, so it's all good.

ETD Update: "What a fuckarow this is turning out to be."

Our departure has been postponed indefinitely, subject to change at a moment's notice.

And since I've been putting off homework (because I thought we were leaving) for about six days now, I'm severely behind.

My grandma came by and stayed for a while; needless to say, she was wearing me out.

• Her: "I know my grandson is perfect; you couldn't convince me otherwise."
  Me: [...]

And don't even begin to talk about me leaving when you're the one that disappeared. Now that you're realizing exactly what you have and what you're probably going to lose, you realize that we've always been there, even when we were passed over and pushed back. Place no responsibility elsewhere; realize everything has been your choice.

At this point I'm ready to just stay home and enjoy the peace while they're gone for a few days.

"Fuck me Freddie"

Okay, so let's go through this...

• We were originally going to leave, as usual, Friday night for vacation (12-14 hour drive).
• Instead, for some unknown reason, we changed it to that Saturday morning.
• However, Mom and Mark decided to help my grandmother in her garden, so it was pushed back to Sunday morning.
• Since we weren't leaving Saturday morning, my sister got to go to the skating rink Friday night, where she fell and "fractured" her arm.
• Considering such, we pushed leaving back to Tuesday morning, so the second radiologist could offer an opinion (not broken, come to find out).
• And then I wake up at 10:00 this morning, assuming that my family has left my sorry ass in bed, to find out that Marissa is sick and has been taken to the doctor.

So yeah. I'm in fucking Arkansas.